How to Kill Your Marriage
|You may be killing your marriage and you're not even aware of it!|
How to Kill Your Marriage
Did you think this was a weird title to use? Right. No married person in his or her right mind wants a marriage to fail. But you know, you may be killing your marriage and you're not even aware of it. So, read on for these signs of marriage-killers so you can identify what you're doing wrong. And, hopefully, be able to make the necessary changes.
1. Always prove you're right.
When conflicts become a matter of proving who's right and wrong, you breed a mentality of "it's either you or me". The "us" thing is lost. The partnership starts to dissolve, and the couple forms their own individual teams. The marriage starts to become competitive and slowly crumbles.
2. Fight over every little thing.
When days are filled with things to complain and fuss about, daily peace is disrupted. The home ceases to be a haven, and stress sets in. Now, who would like to stay home in an atmosphere like that?
3. Start keeping secrets.
Start keeping things from your spouse. Hide your struggles with money spending and hidden debts. Deal with vice and pornography issues on your own. Soon, you'll not only distance yourself from God, you'll also feel uncomfortable in the presence of your spouse.
4. Give the opposite sex a second and third look.
It's normal to get visually attracted to someone you see and meet. But you can get on dangerous ground by letting your eyes and mind give intentional and repetitive stares. You open yourself to temptation, start measuring your spouse against another. Soon, you'll be dwelling on a regret of why you chose to be stuck with this person and start desiring for an affair.
5. Start denying sex and intimacy.
Ignore your spouse's invitation for making out. Soon, he or she may start unleashing pent-up sensual desires on someone else.
6. Don't help around the house.
Tire your mate to death. Soon there'll be nothing left give, no energy for fruitful talk or companionship, and no joy in home life and in the marriage.
7. Don't share the financial burden.
Just let the other think of ways to financially manage. Keep spending. Don't think of ways to cut costs. Don't initiate part time job hunts. Soon, your spouse may likely give up on the obligations and ultimately, on you.
8. Let responsibilities and activities separate you.
Drown yourself in family and work obligations. Stay tight and don't slacken. Tread down the path of busyness and activities. You'll both drift and drift farther apart.
9. Stop getting to know each other.
Stop listening to each other talk about their life. Stop sharing. Let it all be about the job or the kids. Kill your friendship, kill the marriage.
10. Hesitate to correct and stop accepting correction.
Fear voicing out your suggestions. Tolerate wrong attitude and perceptions in marriage. Stop being a complement to the relationship.
Let pride set in. Resent any correction and ideas for improvement. Hate it every time your spouse points something wrong you've done. Take offense when he or she rebukes you for wrong attitude or behavior.
11. Be insensitive.
Don't accommodate mood swings. Make light of discouragements and let downs. Show no mercy when your spouse is not acting or thinking right. Judge. Don't seek to understand. That will turn your spouse off instantly.
12. Stop being supportive.
Don't highlight your spouse's positive ways. Focus on the weaknesses. Don't encourage. Tell your spouse all the ways he or she or (plans) can go wrong. Don't give positive and helpful suggestions. Break your partner, break the marriage.
13. Don't pay attention to hygiene.
Don't freshen up around your spouse. That's one great way to kill romance.
14 Stop looking attractive.
Stop combing. Stop making yourself look great for your mate. Get out of shape. That's one great way to start him or her looking for another lover.
15. Pursue separate interests.
Don't seek to find common ways of relaxing. Have separate hobbies, don't join your spouse in his or her activity. Let your spouse find other friends to go out and do stuff with. That' one great way to invite affairs or competing parties into the marriage.
Some Films that may hep put perspective in your marriage:
The Break-Up starring Jennifer Aniston and VInce Vaughn
The Story of Us" starring Michelle Pfeiffer and Bruce Willis
The Way we Were starring Robert Redford and Barbara Streisand
Something to Talk About starring Julia Roberts and Dennis Quaid
Kramer Vs. Kramer starring Dustin Hoffman and Meryl Streep
Okay, here's at least 1 feel-good marriage film:
The Notebook starring Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams